maybe i am a little too much. too forward. too direct. too needy. too involved.
we’re in the throws of custody arrangements for 11 and 15. everything that has occurred in our household since we filed paperwork has been e.g.g.s.h.e.l.l.s.
i have to be on my best behavior, because “this is the time they’ll think about if they get spoken to at court” or that quite possibly “this is what they’ll go back and tell her when they see her again.”
well. they’re talking back. they’re not doing any work in the house (i.e. chores). they’re not doing anything productive (tablets. tv. video games) and they’re driving me up a wall. i can justify a yell or two at them. especially for the disrespectful crap.
oh well. that i can tolerate.
15’s birthday wasn’t too long ago and everyone came over for dinner to celebrate. 22 just bought a motorcycle and rode it out. then it got cold and very dark and the lights didn’t want to turn on, so he borrowed our truck to take home and parked the bike in the garage overnight (in my spot, i might add.) no big deal. My prince invites 22 and his girlfriend to come to church with us in the morning, since they’ll already be making the drive back out. “We’ll see” is the response he gets. Prince tells him what time we think we’ll be home, so we can make plans and he can figure out when to come. Nothing strange.
We get home from church and lo-and-behold, our truck is back and a bike is running in the driveway. This is odd. Our house was locked. Our garage was locked. 22 doesn’t have a key. 22 finagled his way into our house (aka broke in) while we were at church and his girlfriend was rushing to pack their bags and trying to leave. We make these observations as we pull in and are still in the car. I announce that i’m going to yell at them. Only 15 objects.
So i get out. i ask him how he got his bike out if the house was locked and he chuckled and said, “Magic!” and i proceed to tell him to not do that sort of thing. why couldn’t he have texted us and let us leave a door open for him or just let us KNOW he was doing that instead of intentionally coming when we were at church and trying to leave before we got home? I got in his face a little because he didn’t have the decency to shut his bike off. Girlfriend doesn’t speak. Prince doesn’t speak. I’m shaking.
A mere two weeks ago, we did have someone come in our house unannounced and unexpected. it was a very unsettling feeling and not one I want to re-entertain. 22 is not mine. 22 hasn’t ever tried to get to know me. 22 doesn’t really come around as it is.
22 didn’t come to easter. 22 ran his mouth at his mom’s easter and 19 told us about it.
i’m so frustrated that i am in the wrong for being upset that someone came into my house. MY HOUSE. unannounced. unwarranted. i am in the wrong for speaking up and for getting mad that this happened. the story would be different if he were active and involved in our lives, but he’s not. the younger kids sometimes say he’s not even really their brother, since he’s never around.