seeking out.

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on Sunday, someone finally asked me. not out of surprise or shock, like they usually do when they find out i’ve got 4 step kids and i’m still in college. someone finally asked me how i like being a step mom. and it felt so good. i haven’t seen her in a while and she came to talk to me and just catch up for a moment before we took our seats at church. she asked how i liked it and i felt a huge weight fall.. FALL.. off of my shoulders. *there is someone who sees me!*

so i told her that i love these boys and it’s such a cool opportunity to get to love them and to get to have them love me back and to be an influence and a part of these kids lives, when they’ve already got awesome parents. they have two loving, active parents. and now they have a third. it’s awesome.

but i didn’t just tell her it’s peachy keen and sunshines all the time. i told her sometimes it hurts and sometimes it’s just down right hard and i laugh at myself like “what did you do to yourself?!” sometimes they hurt me and i’m sure i say things i shouldn’t, too.but mostly, overall it’s good.  mostly i remember that i am madly in love with their dad and that when i help out with his kids, i am serving him. as a wife is called to. as i am called to. i am serving him and knowing that this is the biggest task i can help out with is such a good reminder that i am where i am supposed to be, that i am following the plan that God has for me.

it felt so good to have someone really ask me, not just to try to imagine what life would be like at my age with that many kids, that aren’t even mine.

it was another huge reminder that there are people that i should ask. that i should dig into and check up on and just honestly ask how they are doing or what is on their mind. sometimes my mind is too tired to have real conversations with people, or i’m too anxious to carry out a full one. but if i think about how other people have the same struggles and might just be searching for that one ask, why would i ever hold back? why would i ever try to shy behind sleepyness or whatever other excuse? that’s what Satan wants and it’s not what he’s going to get.

so this is my reminder for you, my 3 faithful subscribers, to ask. to remember those around you and to take just a few seconds even and ask them how they really are. it can really have an impact.

 

stepmomma, out.

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